Autum

How I know Fall has come to Bulgaria:

* School has started yet again.

* I need my flashlight to see my way to the bus stop every morning.

* Pumpkins, pumpkins, pumpkins

* Halloween (which almost killed me this year)

* The idea of leaving my house after 5 pm makes me shiver and put on another pair of socks.

* Daylight Savings Time ( for 2 weeks I'm only 7 hours ahead of home)

* Na gostis have moved indoors around the wood stove. Talk has turned philosophical.

* Lytenitsa (pepper chutney) is cooking continuously outside in big black kettles.

* The sound of wood being chopped all over town.

* Burning leaves

* Lots of chili

* Store bought veggies

* Daily scarf wearing (or blankets as one Bulgarian friend calls them)

* Men coming out of the woodwork asking to be my boyfriend (I think they just want to keep warm for the winter).

* Snow in the mountains

* Playing cards indoors with the girls.

* My tan is fading fast!

*** And lastly..... I've turned pensive as I always do this time of year. Thinking of home........

Happy Autumnal Equinox everybody!

Summer!

As promised, here's a recollection of what I've been doing this summer. Again, it comes in the form of an email that I just fished to my best friend, Stacy. She's about to give birth (ok, so she has a few months, but I'm SO tired of waiting!) and we've both been so busy. So I get to kill the proverbial 2 birds with 1 stone. Enjoy!

Hey- I've been busy! hahahh. but seriously, I've been traveling and doing kid stuff.

And missing you too of course!

I finished the school year with a 2 week summer school/camp for my 4-6th graders. We practiced spelling, learned about foods/food groups, animals, habitats, and did lots of arts, crafts and activities. Those summers in Bloomington really paid off. We ended the summer with 2 Mickey Mouse Pin

atas that I made on my balcony. I had so many people come and yell up to me, "Hey, American (or Krisi if they knew me) what are you making?" "Why?" It was hard to tell them in Bulgarian what it was. They have no idea

what a pinata is. Oh well. The kids loved it. Umm.... and I did too. Probably more.

Then we had a meeting for all of the Peace Corps volunteers in our group. Since coming to Bulgaria, we've lost a total of 8 volunteers so far. PC says it's estimated that each group looses about 10% of their members, so...... We all meet in a quaint village in the middle of the country. It looked very Bavarian (if you can picture what that might look like. not sure if I c

an, but it's the word that came to mind.) or maybe Classic German. White

buildings with painted brown trim. The town is known for their wood working. We had a blast.

Lots of meeting during the day, but then off to the restaurants to eat and drink beer. It was fun to see some friend whom I haven't seen since October.

When I got home, I only had time to do some laundry and it was off again to the Rhodope mountains to help with Spelling Bee Camp. Peace Corps joined with an NGO to raise hold it's first Bulgarian English Spelling Bee. The top 3 kids from regionals went to Sofia for nationals and then they all got to attend this camp (given by PC) for free. So 21 students, their english teachers, 9 PC volunteers, and lots of NGO people and their families got to spend 4/5 days in a resort in the

mountains teaching creative learning/writing to some of the best students in Bulg

aria. Talk about inspirational.

I spent 2 hours with a group of kids making cards discussing what they thought the problems were in Bulgaria and their villages/towns and how they could change things. These kids cared! They didn't just want to leave their country and make money somewhere else. They were impassioned and frustrated, just like we are. That's why I love this aged kids. They are idealistic, passionate and sometimes have the most ins

ightful things to add. I'm so glad I was a part this experience. It refreshed me for the upcoming school year.

Ok, on to other things. I'm home now and

planning my next trip: Serbia and Bosnia. Not

sure what that will entail, but I'm excited. I'll keep you posted!

ing. It's been challenging to keep to any schedule because I've been gone so much. And being gone also challenges my

eating habits. I still have about 10 more pounds to loose until I'm at my "happy" weight. Currently I'm a size 8. I haven't been in the single digits for

a long time. I like it! I'd like to come home next year a size 6. But I'd be happy too to just stay like this too.

Ok on to you! I'm glad the pregnancy is going well. Just remember to breathe. Not just during delivery, but in all things. Stay strong and don't compromise. This is too important to let someone else dictate for you.

Miss you and love you so much!

Kristin

Reflections

So this week marks my first year in Bulgaria. And while the week started out exciting and congratulatory, it ended a little melancholy and reflective.

I still need to pinch myself sometimes because I can't believe I actually packed up my life and moved half way around the world. Some call it courageous, and most days I do too. I've tried to carry that courage over to here and to live my life courageously too. It's been difficult. I find myself in situations where I need to remind myself to be in the moment and think about what I want the outcome to be.

So, now it's been a month since I started this post. A month of reflection, a month of changes, a month closer to the end. 13 months left in a country I knew nothing about. And still sometimes can't comprehend.

I'm having a hard time these days with my feelings. As those of you who know me, know, I am a feeler, a giver, a whole self immerser. But here, I've found it hard to balance things out. I want to give, to help everyone all the time. Yet I know that in 1 year I will be gone. And leaving always hurts. So I only let myself go so far. Because how do I invest myself completely knowing an end date is in site? Especially now when I'm looking forward to the next thing, instead of staying here (literally and figuratively).

And now it's been yet another month since starting this post. Not only have I been in Bulgaria for a year, but I've successfully completed 1 year of Peace Corps Service. Our B26 group finished our MSC (mid service conference) where we had the opportunity to reflect on our year of service, reconnect with friends/ PCV's whom we haven't seen in months, and to recharge for the year ahead. It was a great time.

And I am going to end this here. I'll post a new entry where I'll post pictures of MSC and most recently, the Spelling Bee Camp.

Here's to one more year! Cheers!

Feeling Great

It's amazing how a change of the weather and some sunshine can change a person's outlook. I woke up today happy. Truly happy. I was light, like a winter weight was lifted from my shoulders. Do you ever have that feeling like you are bigger than everything around you? That you are all feeling and no thinking? That's how I felt today. I was optimistic and wide eyed. The sunrise was beautiful, the crowing roosters were welcoming and the smell of manure meant Spring.

All day I looked around in wonder. It was almost like the first days in Bulgaria when the baba walking down the street in her mismatched sweater, wool tights, knitted vest and sturdy shoes was a sight to behold. I watched them today hobbling down the dirt road to the store where I'm sure they were going to buy bread, cheese and eggs. I also enjoyed the old дядовци

(grandpas) sitting in a line on the benches outside their houses watching the world pass by, discussing I'm sure the weather, planting, and the potholes that sprung up over the winter.

I spent the afternoon wandering around looking for storks. They should be coming back soon and that means that my red and white bracelets will be taken off and hung on a fruit bearing tree. They are hugely majestic creatures that build humongous nests on the tops of telephone poles around the towns and villages. I am anxious for them to return. It again reminds me of the first days in my small village of 2,000 people. My daily walk to school began with the outline of the pair of storks that lived on the corner telephone pole on my street. We silently greeted each other each morning with a head nod.

So now I am finishing this post sitting on my balcony listening to some great music that matches my feelings. There is hope today. It's a rare feeling here, but today all is possible.

Hope you are all enjoying the coming spring where ever you are.

It's Almost Spring!

That means my birthday week. :)

I'm 37! Lookin' good, right?

Megan and Evan at a cute little hostel in Sofia. It's owned and run by an old man who loves PC volunteers.

A small portion of my Baba Marta bracelets. Love them!

This is an email that I sent to my parents and I realized it made a good blog. Enjoy!

Hey parents!

I got your note and realized I haven't written or blogged for awhile. So I'll give you a small rundown of the goings on here in Bulgaria.

Winter came and it was not as cold as people said it would be. Maybe it's because I'm from MN, but it never got below zero. But that's not to say I wasn't cold. It's a different cold. My apartment is cold, I walk ALOT outside and it's cold, my school is cold.... so you get the picture.

Now it's getting warmer. There's more sun too. It's nice to wake up and have some light to see the icy roads by. And it's nice to know that my walk home will be lighter longer too. I've started to see livestock out of doors too. Donkey carts are more frequent and I've seen small herds of goats and cows out once in awhile. Can't wait till my 2 donkeys who live on my corner come back. I miss the annoyed donkey who's braying sounds like whining. I am also excited to open my doors and use my living room again, to be able to wash more laundry at a time and hang it outside to dry. There's nothing like the smell of fresh laundry dried outside (unless it's plastic burning day). I am also ready to take off my socks. I wear knee highs and another pair of wool socks daily, and my feet are itching to be free (maybe the itching is the dry skin, who knows?). Also I want to show off my guns (my arms). Doing laundry by hand for 7 months and wringing out pants, jeans and the like have done wonders for the shape of my arms. I might even wear a tank top this summer.

My students are struggling, but we are going to succeed! We are all tired, cold and frustrated. They don't want to work and neither do I. I think when the sun shines and the weather turns warmer, we will all learn more. We have more volunteers coming in about a month. Popitsa will have 5 volunteers. My baba will have another girl too. I'm a little worried, because it was so hard for me, I'm afraid how another person will get on with her. I guess it's good that I am so close. I can come over if there is an emergency. But for the most part, I will stay away. This new girl will have to struggle through just like I did. It made me a better volunteer and forced me to sit and be quiet. To be able to be in a an uncomfortable situation for long periods of time and know that it will be alright. The village I teach in will get more volunteers too. I am excited because they will be helping me with my classes. I'm already planning and for the things we can do in small groups.

What else? My birthday! What a birthday week! It started with Baba Marta day. A day to celebrate spring and where people give red and white bracelets and pins to everyone. So I started my birthday week getting around 50 bracelets. But I spent the week before making 125 bracelets for all the students I teach. I also crocheted red and white flowers and attached them to pins for the teachers and co-workers at my school. Lots of work, but totally worth it.

Then on Wednesday, I went to Sofia where there was party for Peace Corps to celebrate 50 years of service and 20 years in Bulgaria. Lots of big wigs spoke, including the ambassador to Bulgaria. We felt important. Then I spent the weekend there in Sofia eating our way through foods we hadn't eaten in awhile. We had McDonald's, Chinese, Burger King, and Russian food. I had the most delicious beef stroganoff. Man! And of course Russian vodka. Which led to dancing.....

Today my co-workers gave me a birthday present... a pretty silver necklace, a shirt (that actually fits) and some perfume. I am so lucky to work where I do. The people there are so warm hearted and generous. I told them that I was so lucky to have them. I think I embarrassed them, but they give me so much and I always get overwhelmed and a little teary-eyed. They make this experience here.

Tomorrow is Women's Day. It's also considered Mother's Day. Kids are making cards and buying flowers along with all the men here. It's nice that they are appreciated. They work so hard in a place where men dominate. But we know who keeps the families fed, loved and life rolling along here. I am honored to be a part of it.

So on that note, Happy Mother's Day mom! Love you!

Love,

Kristin

The Holidays

Happy New Year everyone!

This blog is going to be dedicatedto the holidays, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's.

So let's get started.

Thanksgiving. It seems so long ago. What a different experience here. Instead of gathering with family, we got together with our make shift family here. There were 7 volunteers and 3 Bulgarians. I mustsay that I liked having a big meal with friends. Low key and low stress. We went to my friend Mary's house. She lives inthe next town over from me. Megan came a day early and we got to have some fun VIP time. We ate pizza and drank cocktails. Then like at home, we got up early to start cooking. I wantedto make green bean casserole, apple walnut bread, pickle rollups and a veggietray. As muchas that sounds "traditional" it wasn't. I made "homemade" mushroom sauce, and instead of sliced ham, I used prochutto. But all in all, I'd say the meal was a success. Mary made the best turkey I've ever eaten. And to be with friends cooking, talking, laughing, eating, and playing games is probably the best thing about this holiday. I even think the Bulgarians liked it.

Christmas:

Kate came back to spendtime with her host family. She invited me, so on Christmas Eve the two of us went back to Popitsa and spent a "traditional" Bulgarian Christmas. Dinner was vegetarian only. Also we had to eat either 9 or 12 dishes. 9 for the number ofmonths Mary was pregnant with Jesus, or 12 for the number of months in the year. We also ate biscuits that had money hidden in one of them. Whoever found the money would have luck for the year. Guess who found it? Yup, me! Whoot Whoot! Candles were lit and incense was wafted around the room. I think it was actually frankensence. Christmas day was filled with "na gosti". Kate and I went to visit mybaba, Johnny. She was cooking like a mad woman. Her grandson was supposed to come, but had to stay in Sofia and work. He was sending his friends over to pick up the food and deliver it to him. She didn't have a lot of time tochat, but we talked around her cooking. It's nice to have more language where I can actually have a conversation with her now. Not just nodding and pretending to know what she's talking about. But don't get me wrong, there's A LOT of things she says that Ihave no idea about. Sometimes I thinks she's speaking something other than Bulgarian to me. But when we get frustrated, we just laugh and hug each other. After Johnny it was on to Marianna and Roosi's. They were Megan's host family. Their 2 children were home for the holidays, so our quick stop turned into a 5 hour "na gosti" with food and LOTS of wine. Boy does my Bulgarian get better with liquor. We laughed, talked, gossiped and reminisced about the past summer.

Then to round out the holiday, Kate planned a celebration for the children in Popitsa. We handed out flyers and talked to the librarian and on Tues. we met at the Chitalishte and crafted, colored, played bingo, and had a huge snowball fight. We onlyhad a few kids, but it was fun. The children enjoyed it and we loved being back in our village. Mary came too and got to experience the kids. They are amazing. Mostof the kids that came are part of the "Sunshine" club. They are self governed and prepare plays, art and other "extra" activities that they don't get in school. So for us, they dressed as Santa, Snow White (she's a big part of Christmas here) and Rudolph. They gave speeches and handed out gifts. What an amazing group of young people. Kids back home could take alesson or two from them.

New Year's:

Megan, Kerri and I spent 4 days in Istanbul, Turkey. We took an overnight bus and arrived at 6 am. It gave us time to settle in, take a small nap and hit the town running. Our only "glitch" was that the hostel we booked went out of business the week before and didn't tell us. So as we were standing outside, a man from the neighboring cafe came over and told us the bad news. Let the panic start. But after awhile, we found a Best Western (can't be any more American than that, right?). The man at the information desk was very helpful, since we couldn't afford to stay there (200 euro/night). We were brought a block away to another smaller hotel where we negotiated a price of $90 US dollars a night for the 3 of us. Perfect. So we took out our tour guide book and map and proceeded to see all the sights Istanbul had to offer. I was amazed at all the people. Not amazed because there were a lot, but because I heard so many different languages and no one looked alike. I made a game for myself to try to figure out the language and where the person was from. Lots of people from Germany and other Scandinavian countries. I fit in.

So, the sights. We had a "top 9" list from Phil Rudy, our Peace Corps PTO. So here is our list in no particular order:

1. Basilica Cistern- built as a underwater storage tank. The roof is supported by 336 pillars and 2 upside down medusa heads. No one knows why they are upside down, but they look cool.

2. Blue Mosque- there are 6 minarets. Legend says that they sultan wanted gold minarets and the word for gold and 6 are so similar that he got 6 instead of gold. But he was happy because at that time no other mosque outside of Mecca had 6. It's a beautiful place. Wide spacious and filled with stained glass and colored tiles. I never get tired of seeing them.

3. Haghia Sophia- originally a church, it was converted to a mosque in the 15th century. The mosaics were plastered over and centuries later the plaster started to chip, revealing the beautiful mosaics of Christ, John the Baptist, and the Virgin Mary. There is a Weeping Pillar where it is said that if you can put your thumb in and turn your hand all the way around, your wish will come true. It's harder than it seems.

4. Boat Tour- We took a tour of the Golden Horn by boat. It was our change to see the magnificent palaces on the water and also to boast that we were in Asia. Fun way to see the sights.

5. Spice Market- All I can say is "WOW". It's like the Grand Bazar only with spices. So many people, so many beautiful colors. I don't think I can describe with words. You must see the pictures.

6. Galata Tower- think Eiffel Tower but on a smaller scale. Take an elevator to the top and get a fantastic look at Istanbul.

7. Grand Bazar- probably the most touristy thing todo. Blocks and blocks of shops selling everything from jewelry to souviners, to carpets. Like the Spice Market it was overwhelming. So many people and merchants haggling over prices. My favorite part was watching the young men run around delivering tea to the shop owners and picking empty cups and saucers hidden around the bazar. It was like and easter egg hunt.

8. Topkapi Palace-- It is supposed to house the Prophet Muhammed's cloak and sword. I saw cloaks and swords. I liked to think they were all his. Lots of jewels and relics to look at. It was so big. Hard to imagine people actually living there. There was a separate place for the Sultan's harem but it cost more money to get in, and there were so many people we decided not to go in.

9. Salep Drink- warm milk with honey, cinnamon and other things added. It sort of tasted like liquid pudding. Drink it fast (not too fast because itHOT) because it gets a skin on the top.

10. Turkish Bath- this was the best think I did in Turkey. Also I felt quite courageous. We paid our money and got a sarong, panties and a token. Then having changed into the panties and sarong we wereushered into a large room with LOTS of other naked women. In the center of the room was a large round slab. The entire room was hot (sauna). We waited in the middle of the circle waiting for a free Turkish woman to bathe us. One called us over and after laying on your open sarong, the half naked woman took soap and began scrubbing every inch of your exposed body. 8 months of Bulgarian dirt gone. After, the woman ushered you into a smaller atrium where she washed your hair. Very relaxing.When you were done, you could go into the bath house (like a whirlpool, minus the whirl) and relax in the hot water. If you got too hot, you could go back into the big room and use the fountains of cool water to cool off. When we were thoroughly relaxed, we traded our sarong for a big warm towel and sat in the salon on comfy couches with hot Turkish Tea. Wow.

So there is my update for the holidays. Such a fun experience to break away from "tradition" to learn about others' and to create new memories. I feel so lucky to be able to travel and see new things and experience new things.

New Year's resolution: To be more fearless. And to train and run the 10k in Greece in the fall.

I hope you all had a wonderful holiday and made your own memories.

Love,

Kristin

This is NOT a Vacation

Some people call Peace Corps Bulgaria the "Posh Corps". We have internet. We have access to shops, transportation, and some of us even have washing machines. I understand the term. But some people think that having these conveniences makes our service less difficult. That we may even be on a vacation of sorts.

Well, we are not. We struggle just as much as other volunteers in other countries do. We, too are trying to navigate through a completely different language, culture and expectations. We wake up to unfamiliar views outside our windows and wander around towns where we are stared at continuously. Though we may have some of the conveniences of "home", sometimes it makes being here even harder.

Some days I don't know how to do this. I don't know how to sit and not contribute. I don't know how to wait. I want things to happen in my time frame. I want to understand. Not just the language, but the culture. I want to know why I can't have all the information now. I want to feel relaxed. I want to be looked at like a member of the community, not the outsider. I want more time to think.

Sometimes here is harder than if I would've gone to say, Africa. That to me is the quintesential Peace Corps experience. The one that everyone understands. Living in a grass hut, etc. etc. But here, there are large cities with all kinds of shopping, food, and other worldly things. I can get almost any name brand thing I want. I just have to travel to find it. That makes this all even harder. The juxtaposition of life in a village and the metropolis of the big cities is huge. Talk about a GAP. The potential here is so great, yet sometimes it seems so out of reach.

Then that begs the question, "Is western influence necessary?" I like that I walk everywhere. That my food is as "organic" as you can get. That chopping wood, hand washing clothes and making a meal for a meal's sake each day is not only necessary, but enjoyable. Is convenience such a good thing? We are used to it at home and don't even think about it most days. If we want to go visit someone, we just get in our car and drive. Here I have to coordinate train and bus schedules along with where will I stay because getting somewhere is easier than getting home. I can't just grab a quick bus to the next town over to see a friend (regardless that she only lives a 20 min. car ride away). But I don't take these things for granted anymore. It makes the times spent with people more precious. And to note, back home everyone is trying to get away from "convenience" and are turning to "homemade". So why do we want things to be faster here. See the problem? I want things faster yet at the same time I love the slower paced life. This is no vacation.

Some people forget. They make it about themselves. Why don't you write more.... Well, I'm trying to learn a language, make meaningful relationships here, teach children to care, find my inspiration, and somedays try to find the good. So this is my explaination. It's hard here. It's hard to hear about life back home. It's hard to care about things that go on there when it sounds selfish to even have those issues here. Your job is hard, your principal is not understanding, your snowblower doesn't work, you don't have heat, you want a new car, your boyfriend doesn't call you everyday, you don't have any money. It's hard to keep the ties.

But, I wouldn't change this experience for anything in the world. I've learned more about myself in the last 6 months than I ever thought I would. I've found my voice in some ways. I have to ask for what I want and what I need. I don't feel bad saying that. I have more patience than I thought I could ever possess. And I thought I was patient before. I am stronger, older, more confident, more caring, happier, and more creative. As hard as it can be here, some days I can't picture myself leaving. I can't picture myself going "home". Maybe this is the stepping stone for a life abroad.

Ok enough rambling. Hope this gives you an idea of how I'm handling myself here. The next post hopefully will be more descriptive about Bulgaria. My town and it's people.